My friend and I were once teasing each other and somewhere in our conversation she joked something along the lines of “if you love me, then prove it!”
At the time I had no real response to this, so I laughed off her request. I think I still remember the conversation because I found the request quite intriguing: is there a way to prove love?
If I could go back in time, my response would be simple: “I love you like an axiom.”
An axiom is a fundamental truth in mathematics that lacks a proof. The idea behind loving someone as an axiom is that it’s a fundamental truth that you love them, and though you can’t prove it, it’s true and no one can disprove it either.
I’m not going to lie, I was feeling pretty great about this answer. But I began to rethink it slowly (it seems that I have nothing better to do with my time… ). Was I just taking the lazy way out by saying I loved like an axiom? Was it even possible to love someone so fundamentally that there was no question about whether you loved them?
Well, before you meet the person in question, you didn’t love them (how could you when you didn’t even know about their existence?). Therefore, there was a point where you didn’t love that person, so it’s not a given that you love them today. The axiom isn’t even true!
However, introducing a temporal dimension causes a bit of an issue and seems a little questionable. I mean, I suppose even mathematical axioms use an existential quantifier and assume the existence of whatever they discuss. So perhaps I should modify my statement: “Ever since I’ve known you, I’ve loved you like an axiom.” Could this be true?
I suppose by nature, the being that you’ve known for the longest time is your mother (or father if you’re a seahorse reading this). And for many species, I would say a mother’s love is like an axiom: it’s pretty much a given that if you disturb a mother’s children, she’ll attack aggressively. However, there are also some species that eat their own offspring, so perhaps let’s stick to humans for this logic.
Assume for a second that you “just click” with someone and become instant friends or instant partners. Then is it a given that you love them like an axiom? I would still argue no! There was a clip from the show “Friends” where Monica explains to Chandler that she didn’t believe in the concept of soulmates because relationships were byproducts of active effort. In the same way, I point out that relationships strengthen and grow. Love is not a constant. You show someone you care about them by being there for them when they need you, and they reciprocate. Because love fluctuates, I don’t think it’s a given that you’ll love someone forever and fundamentally so.
But perhaps what’s really powerful about this is that you cannot love someone like an axiom, because it means that if you’re in any sort of healthy relationship (friendship or otherwise), both of you have made an active choice to continue the relationship. You set the stage for how you want to proceed with the important people in your life, and they do the same for you.
So what would my final response be to my friend? I am not sure! The only rigorous proof of friendship I could think of is bringing up every single moment where we were there for each other, but that’s too much work.
Whtaever the case, I do know that I love our friendship.
What did you think? This post is for fun and isn’t really meant to be taken seriously, but if you notice any mathematical inaccuracies or have your own perspective to share, let me know!
At the time I had no real response to this, so I laughed off her request. I think I still remember the conversation because I found the request quite intriguing: is there a way to prove love?
If I could go back in time, my response would be simple: “I love you like an axiom.”
An axiom is a fundamental truth in mathematics that lacks a proof. The idea behind loving someone as an axiom is that it’s a fundamental truth that you love them, and though you can’t prove it, it’s true and no one can disprove it either.
I’m not going to lie, I was feeling pretty great about this answer. But I began to rethink it slowly (it seems that I have nothing better to do with my time… ). Was I just taking the lazy way out by saying I loved like an axiom? Was it even possible to love someone so fundamentally that there was no question about whether you loved them?
Well, before you meet the person in question, you didn’t love them (how could you when you didn’t even know about their existence?). Therefore, there was a point where you didn’t love that person, so it’s not a given that you love them today. The axiom isn’t even true!
However, introducing a temporal dimension causes a bit of an issue and seems a little questionable. I mean, I suppose even mathematical axioms use an existential quantifier and assume the existence of whatever they discuss. So perhaps I should modify my statement: “Ever since I’ve known you, I’ve loved you like an axiom.” Could this be true?
I suppose by nature, the being that you’ve known for the longest time is your mother (or father if you’re a seahorse reading this). And for many species, I would say a mother’s love is like an axiom: it’s pretty much a given that if you disturb a mother’s children, she’ll attack aggressively. However, there are also some species that eat their own offspring, so perhaps let’s stick to humans for this logic.
Assume for a second that you “just click” with someone and become instant friends or instant partners. Then is it a given that you love them like an axiom? I would still argue no! There was a clip from the show “Friends” where Monica explains to Chandler that she didn’t believe in the concept of soulmates because relationships were byproducts of active effort. In the same way, I point out that relationships strengthen and grow. Love is not a constant. You show someone you care about them by being there for them when they need you, and they reciprocate. Because love fluctuates, I don’t think it’s a given that you’ll love someone forever and fundamentally so.
But perhaps what’s really powerful about this is that you cannot love someone like an axiom, because it means that if you’re in any sort of healthy relationship (friendship or otherwise), both of you have made an active choice to continue the relationship. You set the stage for how you want to proceed with the important people in your life, and they do the same for you.
So what would my final response be to my friend? I am not sure! The only rigorous proof of friendship I could think of is bringing up every single moment where we were there for each other, but that’s too much work.
Whtaever the case, I do know that I love our friendship.
What did you think? This post is for fun and isn’t really meant to be taken seriously, but if you notice any mathematical inaccuracies or have your own perspective to share, let me know!
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